Denmark’s Council on Ethics has proposed taxing red meat in an attempt to combat climate change.
So to celebrate, I thought this would be a great time to fire up the charcoal grill and sear a few ribeyes. Get the grill nice and hot, put a spicy dry rub on the red flesh, fire it directly for three minutes on each side, then let it cruise to your desired temperature on indirect heat.
Come on. Let’s do it. Let’s celebrate the possibility of saving the world from the flatulence of cows by enjoying a great BBQ. We at least owe the Scandinavians that much.
In fact, the climate of my life changed dramatically today here in Malaysia when I had sizzling beef for lunch. It was hot and spicy, bubbling and searing itself on the cast iron griddle which was ironically in the shape of a cow. My stall lady must have had a directive from Denmark’s council of ethics. Bring the cow to the forefront of attention. Let the world know of the cow’s power to overwhelm the climate with enough methane to outlast every car in the world. We cannot let this opportunity go to waste. And I didn’t, as I said, since I raised awareness by my sizzling beef. Recipe to follow:
Malaysian Sizzling Beef:
Juicy tender steak, sliced thinly. Sear in oil, Chinese cooking wine, dark soy sauce, chili sauce, sugar, salt, green onions, sliced red onions, and TONS of bean sprouts. Place stir fry on pipping hot cast iron hot plate – preferably in the shape of a cow to help raise awareness of climate change and how cows are the detriment to the world’s survival. Serve over rice.
So will you join me in celebrating Denmark’s Council on Ethics? Let’s do what is ethically necessary. To stop cows from contributing to climate change, we need to eat them. So tomorrow, buy those steaks, Ribeyes are popular here in Malaysia. But wherever you are, sirloin or t-bone or porterhouse will do as well. Hey, go crazy with a prime rib if you like.
We need to do our best just as those famously brilliant people on councils in Denmark are trying to do.
Thank you for making the effort to enjoy red meat.
PS: If you have been taxed too much lately and find yourself short on cash to purchase a thick juicy steak, you can also raise awareness with a simple ground chuck. Chili might be nice. Or sloppy Joes. Or a chili cheese deep if you want to raise awareness about the problems with dairy cows as well.
Denmark thanks you!